one for the clouds
two for soft anxieties
three for self- indulgence and baristas who say hi to me
four for anonymity
the warmth of simple privacy
five for life on cable lines
and feds who tryna wire me
six for the apathy
seven for the practice
eight for five percenters
tryna parcel out the math in me
nine for the caffeinated
ten for the casualties
eleven for the gentleman who broke the glass menagerie
twelve for the riots shields and full metal jacketing
don’t speak on thirteen got a feelin that it’s bad for me
fourteen when i made my first track
fifteen for the nostalgia and the way it’s coming back to me
sixteen i almost died on lake street driving backwards
lost cause my first love had turned her back on me
wouldn’t have made it to seventeen
if i didn’t have an eye for navigation
and a way to keep the traffic clean
eighteen for the vividness of near death experiences
i can taste the fear like it’s happening
nineteen for when her eyes glaze over
on ceramic states of mind
like the homegirl ashley’s
twenty for the lies i told to escape
the devil’s cave
and the men who saw her spirit in its packaging
twenty one for the cycles round the sun
that have passed since i made my first tracks on this galaxy
twenty two too heavy handed fools
in my head always tryna rap battle me
i could be the new god odysseus except i’m such a hypocrite
now isn’t that a goddamn tragedy
twenty three for days
sleepless twenty fours
twenty five couldn’t tell you what the hell i’m counting for
but i’m not gonna quit cause i’m scared to stop trying
twenty six twenty seven twenty eight twenty nine and
thirty thirty one thirty thirty three
thirty eight fourty five fifty one fifty
counting blessings while i’m
hiding in the storms
getting tired but
i’m running out of doors
but i’m running out of doors

counting blessings while i’m
hiding in the storms
getting tired but
i’m running out of doors
but i’m running out of doors

doors

counting blessings while i’m
hiding in the storms
getting tired but
i’m running out of doors
but i’m running out of

...